HURTING WITH HAGAR

God promised our patriarch, Abraham, descendants more numerous than the stars in the sky. Yet, as we noted from our study last week, our sister, Sarah, wearied of waiting for the promise to be fulfilled and plotted her own solution.

So after Abram had been living in Canaan ten years, Sarai his wife took her Egyptian slave Hagar and gave her to her husband to be his wife. Genesis 16:3

According to the customs of her time, Sarah thought she would have a child - an heir to begin Abraham's descendants - through her slave. But, as so often happens when the finite plans of man are pitted against the divine purposes of God, things didn't work out the way Sarah thought they would.

When she [Hagar] knew she was pregnant, she began to despise her mistress. Gen. 16:4

I wonder what "despising her mistress" looked like in day to day existence within the tents of Abraham. Other translations word Hagar's actions:

• "she looked down on her mistress" (MSG)
• "she began to treat ... Sarai badly" (NCV)
• "and was hateful to Sarai" (CEV)

So - what do you think that looked like?

• Did Hagar refuse to do what Sarah asked?
• Did she tip up her chin in Sarah's presence?
• Did she have a haughty attitude?
• Was her body language filled with disdain - and perhaps exaggerated shrugs?
• Was her tone insolent?
• Did she push her abdomen out as far as she could, rubbing her belly or putting a hand to the small of her back emphasizing her condition?

Whatever it was, we can clearly see that Hagar's attitude - and Sarah's as well - produced a powerful enmity between the two women. And as a result, "Then Sarai mistreated Hagar .." Genesis 16:6a

The Hebrew word "mistreated" comes from is strong enough to lead us to believe that Sarah's mistreatment may have involved physical abuse. Does that surprise you about Sarah? Does it make you disappointed in her? Most of us may never have expressed physical violence against someone else; BUT - have there been times when we have allowed jealousy to make us respond unkindly toward someone else? Have there been times when we attempted to get vengeance on someone for the way they hurt us? Have there been times we have inflicted pain on another through cruel and cutting words? Have we spread some gossip that has damaged another's reputation?

We may want to be careful how harshly we judge our sister, Sarah. We may be more like her than we want to admit!

Women seldom have one feeling at a time. Both Sarah's and Hagar's emotions, and the attitudes and actions that those emotions birthed, were probably complex and tangled. But one thing we know for certain - Sarah's mistreatment HURT Hagar. It was so grievous to her that we read in the last part of Genesis 16:6 - "Then Sarai mistreated Hagar; so she fled from her."

Now, you may be thinking that Hagar brought this hurt on herself by allowing herself to "despise her mistress." You may be thinking Hagar got what she deserved. But can I ask you something, my sisters - have you ever suffered because of something that ultimately was your own fault? Most of us have. Most of us have humiliated ourselves at one time or another. Did the fact that you were "reaping what you sowed" make the consequences any easier to bear? No. Did it lessen the pain you felt or ease the hurt in any way? No!

Hagar's pain was real. Our Egyptian sister was hurting. She didn't think she could stand her life in Sarah's tents another minute. She felt alone, misunderstood, mistreated - and she found it unbearable. So she "fled." She ignored the law of the land and, in desperation, broke free of Sarah's clutches.

Who among us has not hurt so badly at some time in our lives that we wished we could just run away from the pain? Many women run away to the numbing effects of drugs or alcohol. Some run away and find temporary solace in a wrong relationship. Others, like me, run straight into the throes of depression. Our sister, Hagar, ran headlong into a barren desert wilderness. When we run away, no matter where we run, we usually find ourselves, like Hagar did, in a barren wilderness of spirit.

If you are hurting today, sweet sisters, don't run away. Run to your Heavenly Father Who loves you with an everlasting love and welcomes you into His outstretched arms. Cast all your care on Him - for He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

Our hurting sister, Hagar, did not know she had that option. . . but she did. Tomorrow we'll talk about how she discovered the answer for her pain.