God's revelation of Himself to me as ABBA is not new. I've been a believer for more than half a century and have heard many teachings of my Heavenly Father as ABBA ... an Aramaic word for Father that translates as an affectionate term in the same way we might say "Daddy" today. Paul wrote in Romans 8:15 that we have been given a Spirit of Sonship and by Him can cry Abba, Father. I have known and loved that scripture for many years. But in March 2000 I encountered Abba right smack dab in the middle of a bustling Jerusalem hotel lobby and my understanding of that name moved to a whole different level.
Here I am with Beth Moore. I count among the greatest occurrences in my life ... right up there with my wedding day and the births of my children ... having had the privilege seven years ago to travel to Israel to participate in the filming of her Bible study, Jesus the One and Only. I remember the day the brochure advertising the trip came in the mail. My heart literally began pounding with an excitement I didn't understand before the brochure was even fully out of its envelope. I was instantly filled with a passionate desire to go ... coupled with an instinctive inner awareness that I was supposed to go. This seemed so very strange to me ... You have to understand how completely out of character this was for me ... totally contradictory to the "me" who never really liked to travel - the homebody "me" who would seldom leave my house if I didn't have to - the "me" who hardly even went to Walmart without Roy! But, with Roy's encouragement I filled out the registration and mailed my check that very night.
As the scheduled time for the trip arrived, no "friend" that I had anticipated going with me had materialized, I had not lost the weight I intended to lose, I had not done the study preparation I intended to do. So here I was embarking on a trip halfway around the world ALONE and not really understanding WHY I was going except that I knew God wanted me to ... but excited beyond belief to get to hear Beth's teaching first hand.
I look back on phrases I wrote in my journal like: "I am leaving on this trip more spiritually needy than I have been in a long, LONG time"and "all my inner struggles of loneliness that have been hounding me for weeks are amplified and overpowering at the moment" and recognize that when I was leaving on this trip, I was on the eve of experiencing a depression that would weave itself in and out of my life for the next six years! I wrote in my journal that what I wanted most from this trip, more than anything else, was to hear from the Lord. Hear from Him, I did!!
God used the children of Israel and my "grandmother heart" to speak powerfully and progressively to me during the time I was in the Holyland. Most of the time I had no idea whether the children were Arab or Israeli. They just all had beautiful olive complexions, dark eyes and smiling little faces and were some of the most winsome children I have ever seen. My heart was incredibly drawn to them!
We toured in Galilee first and then on the second day of touring as our bus turned off one of the side streets of Beit Shean making its way back toward the highway that led to Jericho and then upward to Jerusalem, we saw a group of Palestinian children playing by the side of the road. They stopped their play and began to wave at us. We waved back, in awe of their innocence and beauty. We were charmed by their sweet smiles. Yet, as I looked down at them from my seat on the bus, I couldn't help but think that everywhere we went in Israel we saw their "parents" earning a living in souvenir stands, restaurants, etc by marketing Christ to pilgrims like us; all the while disdaining the Savior we loved. I wondered if these little ones would ever know Christ as anything more than a commodity. My heart grew heavy for them. Would the circumstances of these precious children's births and the traditions of their forefathers keep them from knowing the joy of a relationship with the living God?
Someone on the bus began to sing "Jesus Loves the Little Children of the World" and the rest of us joined in. With my eyes embracing some of the "little children of the world", I could hardly sing for the tears that formed a massive lump in my throat and spilled down my cheeks. I thanked God for His love for these little ones and praised Him for being the Way, the Truth and the Life. I asked Him to make a way for these precious children to know His truth, and experience His life.
The next day we visited the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem. I watched several Jewish fathers take their small sons to the wall with them to pray, grasping their tiny hands, straightening their hats, and leaning to whisper instructions in their ears. I watched as two little boys, perhaps only 5 or 6 years old, mimicked their father's body movements at the Wall. I was impressed by the faithfulness of these men to instruct their children in the heritage of their religion. I realized that Jewish fathers have been doing that from generation to generation. I remembered the law given them by God through Moses and recalled the scripture in Deuteronomy that tells them (and us) to teach our children to love the Lord their God with all their heart and soul and strength as we sit at home and as we walk along the road. It felt like history was unfolding before my very eyes. I thanked God for being the Lord of All History ... the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob ... the One Who sacrificed His One and Only that Gentiles like me could be grafted in and call Him my own. I thanked him for being the same yesterday, today and forever.
As we left the area to proceed on our way around the Jewish Quarter to the Zion Gate, we saw a group of 20-30 children gathered tightly into a group with a talit (prayer shawl) held in the air above their heads while a rabbi blessed them and their parents looked on with pride. I loved hearing the spoken sounds of the Hebrew words even though I did not understand a word of it. I silently prayed and asked God to bless those sweet little ones and to make a way for them to know the One who came to fulfill their "law".
The very next evening as I came up from dinner and made my way across the lobby of the hotel on my way to Bible study, I had a marvelous experience. It was one of those times when God takes a little "ordinary" event and turns it into something so EXTRAORDINARY that it just completely overwhelms you. An adorable little Jewish girl, no more than 2 or 3 years old, ran across the lobby in front of me in swift pursuit of her father. Never even seeing me, I had to stop short to keep from running into her. As she ran, she called out "Abba! Abba!" It's difficult, even today for me to describe the scope of emotions that swept over me in the fleeting moment that the sounds of her words invaded my hearing. I watched her run after her "Abba", her soft baby curls bouncing with every step, and felt incredibly drawn to her. My heart melted as though she were one of my own grandchildren. I longed to scoop her up into my arms, kiss her sweet little cheeks and run my fingers through her soft brown curls. But I watched as her own dear father turned, extended his arms, bent down and did those very things. At that instant, the Spirit of God began to speak to me translating what I was seeing in the physical realm and feeling in the emotional realm to what I needed to embrace in the spiritual realm. "My daughter, the tenderness you are feeling for this little one I feel for you. I will embrace you as my own precious daughter anytime you call to me. Just call. I am your Abba."
It was a profoundly holy moment - right in the middle of a bustling hotel lobby. Isn't it simply too cool for words that the awesome Spirit of God knows no boundaries! The name ABBA took on a new sound within my soul that day and a new depth and dimension within my spirit that defies description. That revelation of God's love sustained me during some of the darkest hours of my depression the next few years. How would I have ever guessed that he had MORE to teach me about Abba's love? I'll tell you about that in my next post. Until then, do you remember the chorus we used to sing:
Abba, Father; Abba, Father;
Deep within my soul I cry.
Abba, Father; Abba, Father;
I will never cease to love You.
Sing it to Him now!
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